guilt - The Daughter Journey

Wandering Child

/ childhood, choices, deceit, drinking, drug use, feelings, getting over my past, grace, grief and loss, growth, guilt, healing, inner child, loving myself today, manipulation, marriage, memoir, ownership, pain, passing of time, redemption, reflection, regret, relationships, sabotage, sadness, small self, struggles, transparency, truth, Uncategorized

I breathe the air of queens pastRespite I thought was sure to lastI was never meant to be your shadow to castYour tag-along you’d drag alongTo […]

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Sex with a Stranger

/ choices, counseling, getting over my past, guilt, memories, mistakes, promiscuity, shame, small self, stuck

Eyes open. I am naked in a bed next to a man who is naked. Heavy, pounding pain with the pace and purpose of a fetal

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I’m still relevant

/ authentic self, authenticity, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, doubt, emotions, feelings, finding my place, getting over my past, growth, guilt, inner child, inner critic, living a better story, love, loving myself today, mistakes, moving forward, ownership, pain, questions, self-sabotage, survival, truth

I was just re-reading my “About” page, checking for typos and just generally making sure the content is still relevant. And yes, unfortunately it’s still relevant.

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Birthday Blues

/ counseling, feelings, forgiveness, grief and loss, guilt, inner child, living a better story, mental illness, regret, relationships, resentment, sadness, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, stability, struggles, stuck, surrender, survival, tomorrow, transformation, transparency, Uncategorized, uncertainty

watercolour, watercolor, paint-2053247.jpg

It’s my mother’s birthday on Friday. I never considered her birthday to be a trigger for my childhood trauma, but alas it is. When I say

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And so I abide

/ grandparents, growth, guilt, healing, journaling, Rituals for Transformation, running, sabotage, scripture, self talk, setbacks, soul awakening, stability, where do I fit in?, will i ever be good enough, worrying

I just had a very clear thought. “It’s Daughter Journey time.” And so I abide… My dad has throat cancer. Cancer. He begins chemo Monday. I

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108 Day Journey

/ adderall, addiction, alcohol, anxiety, baggage, beliefs, binge drinking, blessings, blogging to be better, challenges, choices, clarity, commitment, community, connection, depression, dragontree, drug use, drugs, finding my place, getting over my past, giving to others, grace, growth, guilt, healing, inner critic, Jesus, journaling, medication, meditation, memoir, mental illness, mistakes, mother, mothers, moving forward, narcissism, passing of time, questions, reading, reflection, running, searching, transformation, writing

“Let me know, let me know when I’ve got room to run” – Dermot Kennedy I’m very much moved by music. I easily cry during my

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Winter in Spring

/ addiction, alcohol, anger, anxiety, authentic self, baggage, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, death, decisions, dying, forgiveness, getting out of bed, getting over my past, grace, guilt, healing, human suffering, memoir, memories, mental illness, suicide

“Feels like winter follows you around.” There’s a song by Dermot Kennedy and that is a line in one of his songs. I relate to that

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The Other Scarlet Letter

/ acceptance, aging, ah-ha moments, authentic self, authenticity, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, choices, closure, confusion, connection, courage, dating, depression, forgiveness, freedom, getting out of bed, getting over my past, grief and loss, growth, guilt, memoir, memories, mental illness, regret, secrets, shame

A. A for abortion. This post is about abortion. So, if that is a topic that offends you or you feel strongly about, I’m telling you

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The Emotionally Absent Mother Class

/ acceptance, big steps forward, blogging to be better, books, borderline, childhood, counseling, depression, doubt, emotions, feelings, getting over my past, guilt, healing, inner child, inner critic, mother, narcissism, relationships, searching, self talk, self-doubt, self-sabotage, writing

During a search for support groups for daughters of borderline or emotionally absent mothers, I came across Motherless Daughters Ministry. As I read through their website,

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Oldie but Goodie: Counseling Avoidance

/ anxiety, beliefs, books, challenges, confusion, counseling, depression, divorce, energy, fear, frustration, getting out of bed, guilt, marriage, pain, uncertainty, writing

The following blog post was written in October 2018. I used to be an infamous canceler of counseling appointments. Infamous because of timing and repetition: always

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