sadness - The Daughter Journey

Potter’s Closure

I started off on journey, not toward closure specifically but a journey toward a better life, toward a newer, healthier version of myself. I am seeing a counselor regularly. I have been on medication for several months now. I am […]

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books, childhood, closure, confusion, counseling, depression, emotions, family, freedom, heartache, medication, mistakes, pain, relationships, running, sadness, transparency, writing

Wandering Child

I breathe the air of queens pastRespite I thought was sure to lastI was never meant to be your shadow to castYour tag-along you’d drag alongTo smoke cigarettes and talk cars all nightNo place for a child in your ragged

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childhood, choices, deceit, drinking, drug use, feelings, getting over my past, grace, grief and loss, growth, guilt, healing, inner child, loving myself today, manipulation, marriage, memoir, ownership, pain, passing of time, Random, redemption, reflection, regret, relationships, sabotage, sadness, small self, struggles, transparency, truth

Loss

I spent some time with a good friend yesterday, but even this didn’t help. I think it made things worse. Despite being 10:30 am on a sunny Saturday, I was having a rough day, so many emotions so early in

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confusion, friendship, healing, life, life is hard, living below my potential, sadness, struggles

The Farce Report

“Out of all the times I’ve seen you, this is the best I’ve felt.” — me “That’s great. You are making progress.” — my psychiatrist Poor guy. I wasn’t intentionally lying. I honestly felt like I was doing soooo great.

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anger, anxiety, childhood, counseling, depression, doubt, freaking out, getting out of bed, getting over my past, living below my potential, mental illness, psychiatrist, sadness, struggles, stuck, uncertainty

Prayer of Questions

Is today the day? Has the time finally arrived when I say, “Enough is enough”? When I never look back? When I charge forward propelled with the same force that has held me back year after year, failure after failure…?

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confusion, getting over my past, Jesus, pain, regret, sadness

Silent Expectations

Joyce Meyer recently preached about how silence feeds our fears, our regrets, and our sorrows. She said one of the best things we can do is talk to someone about our pain, get it out in the open, and not

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childhood, reflection, sadness

The day my dog saved my life

It was a Monday about 3 years ago. I had a super depressed day, spent all day in bed on Saturday. Did some crying, felt like I wanted to disconnect from everyone in my life. I thought, “After my husband

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anxiety, bad day, challenges, chocolate, death, deceit, depression, dying, emotions, feelings, food, life is hard, mental illness, sabotage, sadness, self-sabotage, shame, suicide

watercolour, watercolor, paint-2053247.jpg

Birthday Blues

It’s my mother’s birthday on Friday. I never considered her birthday to be a trigger for my childhood trauma, but alas it is. When I say childhood trauma, I’m not referring to physical abuse or sexual abuse, neither of which

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counseling, feelings, forgiveness, grief and loss, guilt, inner child, living a better story, mental illness, Random, regret, relationships, resentment, sadness, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, stability, struggles, stuck, surrender, survival, tomorrow, transformation, transparency, uncertainty

When You Have No Friends

I look around me, and I see no friends. No shopping buddies, coffee dates or spa partners. I have my husband, yes, but every girl needs at least one friend. My friendlessness is due to two main reasons: I sabotaged

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friendship, isolation, julia butterfly, loneliness, sabotage, sadness

Baby Reservations Swiftly Interrupted

I’m having baby reservations. Last week I was saying that if I never had a child it would be my biggest, most sorrowful regret. But I’m nearing the “now or never” age and I’m finding myself not ready. I’m still

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choices, depression, freedom, getting over my past, money, post partum, sadness

Ramblings about Growth and Struggle

Can there be growth without struggle? I switch back and forth between contentment, anger, and sadness. One constant is that I always feel blessed. How can I feel sad and blessed at the same time? I really don’t understand my

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adhd, confusion, growth, life, sadness, struggles

Pretzels Before Pain

“You are just like mom!” my or-so-I-thought-confidante sister yells at me. Says the girl screaming at me because I said she was stressing me out by something she was saying. I don’t even remember what it was about. This same

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borderline, family, forgiveness, healing, mother, passing of time, relationships, sadness, sisters

Sore, Not Soar

“Sometimes you have to find your wings on the way down,” I once heard someone say. Hopeful words if I hadn’t already hit the ground. Where did the problems I was born into end and the ones I created begin?

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childhood, confusion, living below my potential, regret, sadness, self-sabotage, small self

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