I’m really doubting myself right now. Doubting my abilities as a writer, as an employee, a wife. I feel like I don’t have much to offer. I don’t know why these people keep me in their lives — maybe they […]
Doubt is a Mother Keep Reading
bad day, beliefs, blogging to be better, childhood, doubt, getting over my past, identity, mistakes, mother, uncertainty, where do I fit in?
I wanted to write something eloquent. But fuck it. In my therapy, I am uncovering decades of hurt, beginning from even before my earliest memories. My counselor asked me the most incredible question I think a therapist could ask someone
The brokenhearted child Keep Reading
acceptance, authenticity, beliefs, big steps forward, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, confusion, drinking, drug use, drugs, suicide
So my mother, whether rightfully or unrightfully so, gets the blame for my childhood and adulthood challenges. Well, I had a slap-in-the-face epiphany yesterday when I saw a current day photo of my biological father. He looked frail, like a
…in the blogging world. …in the job search world. …in the Christian world (which is not of the world) …in the “You’re a 40 year old woman with a dog and a husband in suburbia USA” world. Aaah. And there
This post is probably a “no-no” Keep Reading
ah-ha moments, authentic self, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, domestic violence, emotions, family, father, fear, getting over my past, healing, inner child, mother, soul awakening, transformation
I was just re-reading my “About” page, checking for typos and just generally making sure the content is still relevant. And yes, unfortunately it’s still relevant. Why unfortunately? It’s still hard to admit my truth. My truth about my childhood
I’m still relevant Keep Reading
authentic self, authenticity, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, doubt, emotions, feelings, finding my place, getting over my past, growth, guilt, inner child, inner critic, living a better story, love, loving myself today, mistakes, moving forward, ownership, pain, questions, self-sabotage, survival, truth
I just want to float away. It seems too easy to be that easy – you can just leave all the pain behind and no longer be in pain even though you’ve floated away from everyone who loves you?
Giving up things of the world Keep Reading
acceptance, adderall, addiction, alcohol, anxiety, baggage, beach, beliefs, binge drinking, blogging to be better, borderline, boundaries, depression, father, Jesus, living a better story, living below my potential, loneliness, loving myself today, memoir, memories, mental illness, mother
I put a hold on my 108-day journey with Rituals for Transformation. Why? I was doing so well, reading the messages twice a day and journaling my insights. I’m trying to live a better life. I’ve made so many boneheaded
Transformation: the book, The Book and a wise owl Keep Reading
acceptance, beliefs, bible study, blessings, books, dragontree, finding my place, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, fruit of the spirit, growth, happiness, healing, Jesus, living a better story, putting God first, reading, redemption, Rituals for Transformation, scripture, self love, transformation, truth, uncertainty, writing
I’m on a journey. I guess you could call it a daughter journey. Some days I forget that I’m a daughter (I also have no contact with my biological father). Yes, I have supportive people in my life like my
There’s just something about her Keep Reading
acceptance, addiction, adhd, alcohol, anxiety, attitude, authentic self, baggage, beliefs, grandparents, grief and loss, mother, Motherless Daughters Ministry, mothers, narcissism, Random, Rituals for Transformation
I am on the 18th day of Rituals for Transformation (RFT) but this is the first day of my “blog everyday” promise. It’s a promise to me as much as it’s a promise to you. It also just makes sense.
“Let me know, let me know when I’ve got room to run” – Dermot Kennedy I’m very much moved by music. I easily cry during my favorite songs. And my favorite artist is singer-songwriter Dermot Kennedy. I listen to him
I attended an emotionally absent mother (EAM) 6-week course offered by Motherless Daughters Ministry in October with the intention of opening up my space, my heart really. I wanted to bring you on my motherless daughter journey by writing to
Laying it out there Keep Reading
adhd, anxiety, authentic self, beliefs, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, confusion, depression, getting over my past, loneliness, loving myself today, mental illness, self talk, suicide, writing
I have no idea why I’m sitting outside, in the sunshine and fresh air, writing. Yesterday I was in bed until 2 pm, then I went to the grocery store with my husband. Don’t even ask about showering. But today
Making Waves: Keep Moving Forward Keep Reading
adderall, adhd, anxiety, attitude, authentic self, beliefs, blogging to be better, challenges, change, control, counseling, depression, emotions, getting out of bed, housekeeping, how to live, inner child, just do it, laundry, life, life is hard, living a better story, living below my potential, loving myself today, mental illness, mood cycles, morning anxiety, moving forward, Outdoors, reflection, searching, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, self-sabotage, soul, sunshine, transparency, vyvanse, where do I fit in?, will i ever be good enough, worrying
This post isn’t going to really serve the purpose of much of anything. It’s literally random ramblings I’m having post-EAM class. It is Thursday after all, thus I have the Emotionally Absent Mother class which wrapped up about 45 minutes
The following blog post was written in October 2018. I used to be an infamous canceler of counseling appointments. Infamous because of timing and repetition: always last-minute and approximately 3 out of 4 appointments. My previous counselor once told me,
Oldie but Goodie: Counseling Avoidance Keep Reading
anxiety, beliefs, books, challenges, confusion, counseling, depression, divorce, energy, fear, frustration, getting out of bed, guilt, marriage, pain, uncertainty, writing
I’m going to try something new. I’m still working on the whole staying consistent thing, so we’ll see how long this lasts. Basically, I’m going to ramble about my thoughts and experiences I’ve had through the day, ruminating thoughts, bouts
You are an older version of your childhood. Your mistakes follow you. The places you want to get away from is where you will always end up. The words someone tells you are true. You are your circumstance. You will
Three Decades of Beliefs Keep Reading
beliefs, childhood, identity, life, stuckYou are an older version of your childhood. Your mistakes follow you. The places you want to get away from is where you will always end up. The words someone tells you are true. You are your circumstance. You will
Three Decades of Beliefs Keep Reading
beliefs, childhood, life, self talk, struggles