loving myself today

Here’s your Christmas card.

This year I’m not sending out Christmas cards. I’m unveiling my personal blog. I’ve been journaling for about 15 years and this blog is a culmination

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authentic self, big steps forward, blessings, books, borderline, boundaries, challenges, childhood, cleanse, closure, community, connection, contentment, decisions, depression, freedom, getting over my past, giving to others, glory, grace, gratitude, growth, happiness, healing, Jesus, journaling, living a better story, love, loving myself today, marriage, resilience, stability, suicide, transformation, transparency, writing

The Identified Patient Extends to Immediate Family

My role as identified patient extends beyond my mother…apparently. I spoke up to my immediate family about recent mistreatment I received by my sister’s boyfriend. The

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blogging to be better, boundaries, childhood, choices, clarity, compassion, control, counseling, courage, family, father, growth, healing, identity, loving myself today, mental illness, mother, moving forward, new understanding, patterns, redemption, reflection, relationships, resilience, self love, sisters, stability, suicide, transformation, transparency

Wandering Child

I breathe the air of queens pastRespite I thought was sure to lastI was never meant to be your shadow to castYour tag-along you’d drag alongTo

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childhood, choices, deceit, drinking, drug use, feelings, getting over my past, grace, grief and loss, growth, guilt, healing, inner child, loving myself today, manipulation, marriage, memoir, ownership, pain, passing of time, redemption, reflection, regret, relationships, sabotage, sadness, small self, struggles, transparency, truth, Uncategorized
snail, gastropod, mollusc-7253351.jpg

I’m still relevant

I was just re-reading my “About” page, checking for typos and just generally making sure the content is still relevant. And yes, unfortunately it’s still relevant.

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authentic self, authenticity, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, doubt, emotions, feelings, finding my place, getting over my past, growth, guilt, inner child, inner critic, living a better story, love, loving myself today, mistakes, moving forward, ownership, pain, questions, self-sabotage, survival, truth
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Giving up things of the world

I just want to float away. It seems too easy to be that easy – you can just leave all the pain behind and no longer be in pain even though you’ve floated away from everyone who loves you?

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acceptance, adderall, addiction, alcohol, anxiety, baggage, beach, beliefs, binge drinking, blogging to be better, borderline, boundaries, depression, father, Jesus, living a better story, living below my potential, loneliness, loving myself today, memoir, memories, mental illness, mother
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Getting rid of the icky

So what’s been helping my mood? Rituals for Transformation is the biggest reason and it’s because the book calls for twice a day meditation and journaling.

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anxiety, authentic self, authenticity, big steps forward, blogging to be better, books, challenges, change, childhood, counseling, dragontree, feelings, getting over my past, grace, growth, happiness, healing, inner child, inspiration, journaling, living a better story, loving myself today, self-doubt, writing
man, head, mind

Mental Health Woes and Wanderings

Currently close to 2:30 a.m. I’m sitting outside, with my laptop of course, and I’m just enjoying the night. While listening to Dermot Kennedy. I actually

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baggage, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, counseling, creativity, death, depression, friendship, getting out of bed, getting over my past, inner child, inner critic, loving myself today, mental illness, mistakes, mother, personality traits, sabotage, will i ever be good enough, writing
wave, ocean, sea

Making Waves: Keep Moving Forward

I have no idea why I’m sitting outside, in the sunshine and fresh air, writing. Yesterday I was in bed until 2 pm, then I went

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adderall, adhd, anxiety, attitude, authentic self, beliefs, blogging to be better, challenges, change, control, counseling, depression, emotions, getting out of bed, housekeeping, how to live, inner child, just do it, laundry, life, life is hard, living a better story, living below my potential, loving myself today, mental illness, mood cycles, morning anxiety, moving forward, Outdoors, reflection, searching, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, self-sabotage, soul, sunshine, transparency, vyvanse, where do I fit in?, will i ever be good enough, worrying
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