I’m dangerously close to the deadline of submitting my stories for the PTSD/Suicide Prevention book. I’ve always been a procrastinator, and some of my best work has come when I was down to the wire. I decided I’d pick up Inner Voice of Love by Henri Nouwen and read a spiritual imperative. I could not believe how incredibly relevant his words were to my writing road blocks, the biggest being helping whoever reads my stories when I am still so, very wounded.
Let God Speak Through You
“You are confronted again and again with the choice of letting God speak or letting your wounded self cry out.” “…your vocation is to speak from the place in you where God dwells.” Well my writing problem was pretty much just solved after reading this. In a writing workshop I attended, the author said, “Write from scars, not wounds.” I have been trying to keep this in mind when writing the story of my childhood, unsuccessfully so because my story is like a never-ending sob fest. Where is God in my words? The answer is nowhere. My wounds are doing the talking when it was God who kept me walking during those challenging years.
“Claim the God, in you, and let God speak words of forgiveness, healing, and reconciliation, words calling to obedience, radical commitment, and service.” Speaking from the place where God dwells within me could bring someone closer to Jesus, could bring someone to Jesus. I feel like I can shut down my mind and just type without incorporating what my inner critic thinks I should say.
Nouwen goes on to to say that others “will point out your needs, your character defects, your limitations and sins” and that they will do this in an attempt “to dismiss what God, through you, is saying to them.” Nobody wants to listen to God. Including me. He’s rather inconvenient, asking you to do difficult things for a greater good that you do not yet understand. If I am to let God speak through my writing, he will be talking to people who are reading and they may not want to hear what he is saying. But since they are my words I may become the target of harsh responses. However, Nouwen continues, “But God has called you to speak the Word to the world and speak it fearlessly.” Yaaaass!
“While acknowledging your woundedness, do not let go of the truth that lives in you and demands to be spoken.” Done.