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An Evening I Will Not Forget

Dermot Kennedy’s songs came up twice in last weekend’s Writespace workshop, which was about connecting your writing to sounds. And, I signed up for the workshop with Dermot Kennedy on my mind because I am so, very moved by his […]

An Evening I Will Not Forget Keep Reading

big steps forward, books, childhood, community, feelings, getting over my past, growth, healing, inner child, inspiration, living a better story, meeting new people, memoir, mother, mothers, moving forward, music, pain, progress, relationships, self talk, taking control, transformation, writespace, writing

Wandering Child

I breathe the air of queens pastRespite I thought was sure to lastI was never meant to be your shadow to castYour tag-along you’d drag alongTo smoke cigarettes and talk cars all nightNo place for a child in your ragged

Wandering Child Keep Reading

childhood, choices, deceit, drinking, drug use, feelings, getting over my past, grace, grief and loss, growth, guilt, healing, inner child, loving myself today, manipulation, marriage, memoir, ownership, pain, passing of time, Random, redemption, reflection, regret, relationships, sabotage, sadness, small self, struggles, transparency, truth

The Letter I Wish My Mother Wrote Me

Dear Kristin, Congratulations on graduating from Texas Tech. I’m sorry I wasn’t there; I should have been. Here’s the deal. I was a shitty mother. I was mean to you. I was sweet to you, too, which probably made things

The Letter I Wish My Mother Wrote Me Keep Reading

childhood, confusion, depression, freedom, getting over my past, grace, healing, inner child, living a better story, manipulation, mistakes, mother, mothers, redemption, reflection, suicide, writing

This post is probably a “no-no”

…in the blogging world. …in the job search world. …in the Christian world (which is not of the world) …in the “You’re a 40 year old woman with a dog and a husband in suburbia USA” world. Aaah. And there

This post is probably a “no-no” Keep Reading

ah-ha moments, authentic self, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, domestic violence, emotions, family, father, fear, getting over my past, healing, inner child, mother, soul awakening, transformation
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I’m still relevant

I was just re-reading my “About” page, checking for typos and just generally making sure the content is still relevant. And yes, unfortunately it’s still relevant. Why unfortunately? It’s still hard to admit my truth. My truth about my childhood

I’m still relevant Keep Reading

authentic self, authenticity, baggage, beliefs, blogging to be better, borderline, childhood, doubt, emotions, feelings, finding my place, getting over my past, growth, guilt, inner child, inner critic, living a better story, love, loving myself today, mistakes, moving forward, ownership, pain, questions, self-sabotage, survival, truth
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Birthday Blues

It’s my mother’s birthday on Friday. I never considered her birthday to be a trigger for my childhood trauma, but alas it is. When I say childhood trauma, I’m not referring to physical abuse or sexual abuse, neither of which

Birthday Blues Keep Reading

counseling, feelings, forgiveness, grief and loss, guilt, inner child, living a better story, mental illness, Random, regret, relationships, resentment, sadness, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, stability, struggles, stuck, surrender, survival, tomorrow, transformation, transparency, uncertainty
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Getting rid of the icky

So what’s been helping my mood? Rituals for Transformation is the biggest reason and it’s because the book calls for twice a day meditation and journaling. Plus, I’m reading all of the good messages of the day in the book.

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anxiety, authentic self, authenticity, big steps forward, blogging to be better, books, challenges, change, childhood, counseling, dragontree, feelings, getting over my past, grace, growth, happiness, healing, inner child, inspiration, journaling, living a better story, loving myself today, self-doubt, writing
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Mental Health Woes and Wanderings

Currently close to 2:30 a.m. I’m sitting outside, with my laptop of course, and I’m just enjoying the night. While listening to Dermot Kennedy. I actually feel a sense of joy, which I haven’t felt in awhile. I couldn’t sleep

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baggage, blogging to be better, challenges, childhood, counseling, creativity, death, depression, friendship, getting out of bed, getting over my past, inner child, inner critic, loving myself today, mental illness, mistakes, mother, personality traits, sabotage, will i ever be good enough, writing
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Making Waves: Keep Moving Forward

I have no idea why I’m sitting outside, in the sunshine and fresh air, writing. Yesterday I was in bed until 2 pm, then I went to the grocery store with my husband. Don’t even ask about showering. But today

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adderall, adhd, anxiety, attitude, authentic self, beliefs, blogging to be better, challenges, change, control, counseling, depression, emotions, getting out of bed, housekeeping, how to live, inner child, just do it, laundry, life, life is hard, living a better story, living below my potential, loving myself today, mental illness, mood cycles, morning anxiety, moving forward, Outdoors, reflection, searching, self loathing, self talk, self-doubt, self-sabotage, soul, sunshine, transparency, vyvanse, where do I fit in?, will i ever be good enough, worrying
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Sunrise

My Instagram feed told me that Michelle Obama just turned 57. Some may say she’s at the peak of her life. Her beauty, inside and out, is so apparent. And she is beautiful. She is America. Then I got to

Sunrise Keep Reading

aging, ah-ha moments, anxiety, authenticity, change, decisions, depression, dolphins, dreams, getting out of bed, getting over my past, inner child, inner critic, life, loving myself today, mental illness, mistakes, moments, moving forward, passing of time, struggles, stuck, success, worrying, writing

The Emotionally Absent Mother Class

During a search for support groups for daughters of borderline or emotionally absent mothers, I came across Motherless Daughters Ministry. As I read through their website, I thought, “This is exactly what I’m looking for. I need this.” Then I

The Emotionally Absent Mother Class Keep Reading

acceptance, big steps forward, blogging to be better, books, borderline, childhood, counseling, depression, doubt, emotions, feelings, getting over my past, guilt, healing, inner child, inner critic, mother, narcissism, relationships, searching, self talk, self-doubt, self-sabotage, writing

On the journey of med adherence

I’ve been trying to find a way to say without saying that I have a problem taking prescription drugs as prescribed. I overtake the uppers to try and feel the least bit of relief from my depression and then overtake

On the journey of med adherence Keep Reading

adderall, addiction, adhd, anxiety, authentic self, authenticity, challenges, choices, depression, diet, getting over my past, guilt, inner child, loving myself today, memoir, mood cycles, self-sabotage, shame, tightness in chest
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